“Every song has a story and, every story…a song.”
Share It With Me Story
To My Family
“When like a castaway you’re drifting on the pain of the past, and the harbors of tomorrow can’t be found; you can share it with me.”
Performed by Emily Dwyer.
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Share It With Me
Prologue – “Communication is the lifeblood of every relationship.” – Fr John Powell, SJ from the book “Unconditional Love”
Prologue- “Vulnerability is the birthplace of joy, creativity, of belonging, of love.” Brene Brown-Ted Talk, 2011.
Bjorn is Katherine and Adam’s son, and our fourth Grandson. He will be one in a couple of weeks. For the past six months, Katherine, Adam, Bjorn, Jane, and Nani lived at Greenwood with the intention of building a Tiny House on our property. That didn’t work out but, we had six months with the Grands and saw Bjorn grow very quickly.
Bjorn got to the point where he was constantly babbling and able to stand by holding on to something. Linda’s response to him was consistent; “I see you”, while my response was to babble back at him. As I think about it, Linda’s response was more than a passive one. I feel it is connected to a deeper understanding of what human emotional development requires to have healthy self-esteem; feeling secure in one’s self and eventually capable of vulnerability and compassion; of being seen; just as you are.
Throughout the initial decade after leaving my family, I yearned to know what my children struggled with as they were growing up so damn quickly. But that yearning was horribly misplaced. Instead of wanting them to know “I see you,” I wanted them to say to me, “I see you.” My agenda in developing relationships with each of them was all about building my self-esteem, my security, my trust, and on and on.
Share It With Me was a song written in response to lost opportunities during those years. It was a very painful lesson. Everything I learned was poured into that song. Once the song was written, I had to put it into action. Very slowly, I began to understand how important it was and still is, to make sure they know, regardless of what they see in me; unconditionally… “I see you.”
PS I am very grateful to Emily for performing Share It With Me. Her interpretation is far and beyond what I could do for this song. I love thee MyEmily.